Thursday, May 18, 2017

Don't Panic!

Okay, so sometimes I get into a tether about things, normally things I can’t control. My mind takes off like a stampede of whild horses.  My husband just looks at me sometimes and says “where do you come up with these thoughts”. Basically I’m just a little strange.

We have been dealing with some issues with his mom who is 93 years old. God bless her. Out weeding her flower bed and fell, hit her neck and fractured her T-2. She is now in rehab for the next few weeks. We all think she should live in an assisted living home but she won’t hear of it. She can’t see out of one eye and is blind in the other, but still climbs in the attic, rakes leaves and takes care of herself. Her son’s can’t get her to understand she would be safer and happier in a home where she can visit with others and there is always someone there to help her. Nobody wants to be the bad guy and make her do it.

I don’t understand her objection to this concept. Live in a cute little room, somebody else is cooking and cleaning for you. You can visit with somebody any time of the day and do activities. Watch TV whenever you want. Sounds good to me. Lord willing when my time comes I will go willingly. 

Then I started thinking about myself (there lies the problem). What if I need to go into a home, will we have the money. I started panicking about how much it would cost, we don’t have insurance to cover that right now. What is going to happen to me? I’m going to end up in one of those horrible nursing homes where they don’t take care of you. I’m going to lie in bed all day and get bedsores. No one will visit me because they can’t stand to go into one of those places because it is so depressing. Those who can walk around just meander through the halls muttering to themselves with drool running out of their mouth.

See how fast I went downhill on this train of thought? I mean I was just running down that scary hill straight to the bottom. Full speed ahead like a train out of control. That is exactly what was happening, I was out of control.

Needless to say it was a somewhat sleepless night for me.

When I woke the next morning things did look brighter. The sun was shining and I had a better attitude. But it did get me thinking. I can do some things to avoid that scenario that I had created in my mind. Save more money, look into better insurance coverage and pray. 

Why is it I always have to go through all the human emotions before I get to the one thing that should be the first thought? Pray. Only God can control all of this. No, He will not send money down from heaven like manna, but he has given me abilities and talents that I can use to make the money to help myself. The rest is up to God. How I die, when I die – that is all His.

Mark 5:33
But the woman, fearing and trembling, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell down before Him and told Him the whole truth.

Isn’t this what we should be doing? When things get out of control, either real or imagined, the first thing we should do is bow down before our God and pray for His will to be done in the situation.

I’m going to try and do this more. Pray first. How about you?

May God Bless!